However, as we saw in New York between 1993 and 2001 when Mayor Giuliani tackled the horrific serious crime rates in that metropolis – he surprised everyone when he focused first on petty crime. The result was that big crime was reduced by over 50% to the point where it became relatively safe for womenfolk to walk down the streets. The same can apply here.

Meetings are just one of the examples of where addressing a few little things can have an impact elsewhere. Allowing partners to consistently be late for meetings, fiddle with mobile devices or take calls, even if done quietly, is tantamount to what is depicted here; chaos, rudeness and ultimately will cause a break-down of communication and respect. Leaders need to nip this in the bud and set the example in doing so. (Sean Larkan, Edge International)

What are some little things which at first blush don’t seem to warrant making a fuss over? Let’s take meetings as an example – for instance, allowing:

1. people to be consistently late for meetings;
2. people to get away with simply not turning up and not notifying anyone in time or giving a reason;
3. the checking of emails or searching the net on PDAs;
4. people to keep their phones switched on, take calls or walk out to do so;

What message are being sent by the transgressors?

1. you are all less important than what is on my device or what I am thinking about;
2. this is boring ; I would rather be fiddling with this;
3. no-one cares if I am late;
4. I don’t respect the people or the system;
5. my mind is elsewhere but no-one seems to mind;
6. I am unable to focus on one thing at a time.

What are the other ramifications?

1. they are being selfish and thinking that what they are doing is more important than what others are doing; if not addressed, this becomes ‘okay’ behaviour;
2. they will repeat this behaviour and attitude in front of people who report to them who will learn bad habits;
3. they will do it to clients;
4. attendance at meetings will eventually drop;
5. it can lead to a chaotic situation – meetings become a shambles and lose impact. Apart from being irritating and frustrating this costs serious money in wasting the time of expensive resources;
6. it impacts leadership confidence;
7. it impacts respect for leadership roles;
8. it has a knock-on effect in other parts of the organisation;
9. it is a sign of weakness;
10. it will invariably be counter to what the firm’s values state;
11. people follow what others do or what leaders allow – it has a horrible way of being replicated.

Fortunately, these are things we can change. Essentially this is about training ourselves and others to be timely, show respect, be one-focused, one-pointed and not easily distracted in relation to meetings or in conversation with someone. Sometimes simply asking people or reminding them from time to time is not enough. It may take a tougher stance and setting the example.

As Eknath Easwaran, the influential eastern spiritual teacher taught, we can train our attention wherever we are, whatever we are doing, and the benefits are well worth the discipline.

We have all been on the highway when another driver has allowed him/herself to become distracted. It can be disconcerting and dangerous. (Sean Larkan Edge International)

He gives the example of sharing the highway with a distracted driver with his mind on other things – in the lane next to you and suddenly, without warning, he wanders into your lane. Then, with equal abruptness, he realizes what he has done and overreacts – first with the brake, then with the accelerator – and darts back into his own lane. An accident waiting to happen.

If we could only see it, everything in life suffers like this when attention wanders. A mind that darts from subject to subject is out of control, and the person who follows its whims weaves through life, running into difficult situations and conflicting with other people. But the mind that is steady stays in its own lane. It cannot be swept away by an impulsive wish to check an email or the Internet on a PDA. There is no skill more worth learning than the art of directing attention as we choose.

What to do in relation to the example given above? It is really simple:

1. meetings start on time;
2. leaders should arrive at least 5 to 10 minutes before a meeting and be organised to start on time;
3. no PDAs or cell-phones in sight or ‘on’ in meetings;
4. if anyone arrives late too bad, the meeting commences;
5. no calls in meetings;
6. if someone is addressing the meeting give him/her 100% attention;
7. emphasise that all this is not about being nit-picky but about showing respect for one another, being sensible and living the firm’s values, which 99% of the time will require respect for one another.

As Easwaran said “there is no skill more worth learning than the art of directing attention as we choose” – we do this when we arrive on time for meetings, when we do not allow ourselves to be distracted and we pay attention to someone else when they are talking to us. Such simple things. Such big impacts, throughout an organisation. And it all needs to start with the leaders.

Sean Larkan, Edge International

One needs a simple system to track these elusive, important items.

Leaders need to develop a system to manage following up on the dozens of important, single items that crop up and need attention – via email, a web article, a tweet or a LinkedIn enquiry (Sean Larkan, Edge International)

Over time, all of us have probably worked up some or other system to try to do this – if they are anything like the ones I have tried, they are probably a bit hit and miss and sometimes more trouble than they are worth – this in turn creates its own pressure as you are always worrying that you may have overlooked an important item.

When I used to help run large law firms one of the things I used to say to new lawyer recruits on the subject of  ‘what it takes to succeed in a  law firm?’ is that I had seldom come across a successful practitioner who was not accessible, responsive and reliable (‘ARR’). I think this applies equally to leaders – that is why leaders need a simple system for following up emails and other electronic items that cross their desks.

Some busy leaders deal with this by simply tackling all enquiries virtually as they hit their desks – this is their system – they never sleep and seem to have an email system wired into them as an extension of their bodies – a couple of leaders of law and accounting firms spring to mind. These are seriously busy people but I am always astonished how they have always, consistently, managed to do this. Very impressive. Most of us don’t manage to effectively be on-line 24/7.

I have evolved a simple system which I would like to share:

1. create a To Do list in something like MS OneNote - fantastic for this purpose (and for many other uses) by the way as: 
   • it updates between all your devices; and 
   • you can easily select and slide headings or a group of items under a heading in your To Do list up or down according to priority, and it renumbers accordingly;
2. create an Evernote account (free) and create a notebook in Evernote (by right-clicking the heading ‘notebooks’) called ‘Actionable emails etc’. You will see that after installation (you may have to select this as an option) an Evernote button pops up on your email account e.g. Outlook or in your browser header e.g. Chrome, IE etc.;
3. any time you get an email, URL or article link that you want to track and it is not attached to a particular project you can simply click on the Evernote button, choose the ‘Actionable emails etc’ notebook in Evernote and it will automatically drop a copy in there for easy later recall or follow-up. The beauty is, once you have done this it is not going to get lost  and is dead easy to access;
4. at the top of the To Do list insert an item – ‘Actionable emails etc’ – this is merely to prompt you to flick to Evernote daily or from time to time to run through those actionable items and attend to any that may have slipped by, and of course delete those you have dealt with;

Once this is set up it is really quite easy and relieves stress and pressure as you are not worrying about items that may have slipped through the cracks. Another benefit is that it is more or less automated as well as being quick and easy. As mentioned, you can also access OneNote and Evernote from any of your devices. 

Maybe readers have other good systems they have perfected and would like to share?

Sean Larkan, Partner, Edge International

Accessibility is not simply a question of saying you adopt an open door policy - it is about your partners and staff feeling and believing you are accessible. It is what they think and not what you believe you are or are not doing that matters. If you are not sure, you should seek feedback. Chances are they will have a different perception on this to you. For a start don't just open the door, walk out the door to connect with others.

I remember when I was in a managing partner role I thought I did a pretty decent job of being accessible and getting around to see people – I am willing to bet though that plenty of the staff and partners didn’t think so. The reason is I have since realised its not what I thought about this that mattered, but what they experienced and felt. Too often we look at these things from our perspective and although we may feel we ‘get it’, we often don’t. It is all about the perception of others. Everyone amongst those others is different. Everyone thinks differently. So, I don’t think I gave it quite enough thought at the time and should have. I suspect many leaders don’t. They should. It is that important.

You will quite often hear law firm leaders say things like ‘I have an open door policy’ and so on. This is a good start, if it is true and if that results in people actually feeling they can come through that door, or approach the leader in the passage or canteen and discuss what it is they want to discuss or better still, offer up some innovative or strategic ideas for the firm. Too often that door can stay open all day but people will simply not cross the threshold as they don’t feel comfortable.

Rather than simply having an open door policy the key is to create an atmosphere where people feel comfortable communicating and sharing their thoughts.  It seems to me to be more about stepping outside the door and being accessible outside rather than sitting in your office with the door open and assuming others will regard you as accessible based on that assumption and gesture.

The physical side of it is just one part of it – people can quickly sum up and sense what is going on; they know if you are simply going through the motions – if you don’t bother to learn names, don’t listen well, your body language is wrong, don’t spend some time, don’t follow up on a previous discussion, don’t follow through when you have said things like ‘I’ll get Joe our HRM to look at that for you’. Also if you have a hang-dog, rushed or impatient look about you they aren’t going to want to add to your woes by delaying you from your busyness. Or worse still they may think you don’t care or don’t want to.

What are some practical things you can do to be more physically and perceptually accessible? Here are a few examples:

• there are seldom if ever instances when leaders are not dealing with some big challenge or working on some exciting strategically important matter for the firm – don’t let this get in the way of accessibility – you have to make accessibility work despite these other circumstances;
• make a point of actually getting out of your office and wandering around each floor at least once a week if you can – it really doesn’t have to take too much time – it’s about quality not quantity;
• remember, this is about them having a chance to say something to you, hear you, see you and so on, not about you creating an impression and looking good;
• make sure you know the names of your staff – if not, introduce yourself – if you are no good at it learn some tricks to get good at it;
• if someone raises something say you will see it is followed up on and make sure it is;
• be prepared to linger now and then to listen to someone;
• take up where previous discussions left off;
• do more listening than talking;
• remember important personal things that have happened for people – touch on those;
• smile, relax, remember body language, which is a huge part of what we appear to be communicating; and
• tell people interesting things about what others have achieved or done or the firm has achieved. They will feel respected and valued.

all the best, Sean Larkan, Partner, Edge International

Nearing the final day of a gruelling 1300km charity cycle ride for the two young men, James Larkan and Steve Richards - in two rides in two years they raised A$80 000 for Youth Focus, a charity dedicated to helping young people struggling with depression and potential suicide in Western Australia

I found this thinking changing for me as my own three children grew into young adulthood and as I took on managing partner roles in law firms and witnessed the talented, hard-working, articulate, confident young kids coming through our interview processes. More and more I found myself thinking the opposite was true – we had as much if not more to learn and admire from ‘them’ as they ever did from ‘us’. In fact, since then, I have never stopped learning from observing them.

30km headwinds on the penultimate day, after 7 days in the saddle, proved tough-going!

A recent example, very close to home, brought this firmly back to me. My son James, busy with final year university in Perth, West Australia and a full-day part-time job running a warehouse, joined his best mate Steve Richards in tackling a 1300 km cycle ride from Exmouth to Perth over 8 days to raise funds for the Youth Focus charity which counsels and support kids struggling with depression and potential suicide. This backed up on their 600km mountain bike ride along the famous Munda Biddi mountain bike trail the year before from the south western corner of West Australia to Perth, also over about 8 days. They raised $80000 doing these two rides. Tragically Steve lost his brother Mark to suicide 3 years ago and the rides were dedicated to Mark.  A nice touch was that James’ two sisters, Kerry and Jess, also quietly weighed in and supported the boys, organising a very successful raffle and contributing and arranging some fantastic prizes for it.

Steve’s Mum, Anne, former Australian squash representative, who with her amazing Mum, Pat, and partner Dave, remarkable people all, spent every minute of every day with the boys, said it best when the boys arrived in Perth:

“I’m not going to say too much today, most of you have read the couple of updates I sent so I think you can visualise a little of the picture of this amazing journey. There have been so many stories within stories during this trip, just too many to talk about today and nearly all these stories are touching or emotional in some way.

The boys passed through some amazing countryside - the Pinnacles desert-scapes near Cervantes

It is a huge relief for me to have Steve and James here safely today!

I think I need to keep it simple. This all began because Mark died. He was living in incredible pain and took his own life, exactly three years ago today at about 7.30 tonight. It is a day to celebrate but to me, to Steve, our family and everyone who knew Mark it is terribly sad, we lost someone special.

Steve, who loves his brother dearly, had a need to do something in the way he knows best (something physical, challenging and painful) to honour Mark’s life and memory. He chatted to his best mate James who “despite his size and hairy eyebrows” is the most caring, loving and thoughtful man. James and Steve together have achieved Steve’s goal and have truly honoured Mark and kept him alive for us. But along with that they have done so much more. They have through their massive efforts raised a lot of money, close to $80 000 in two “Rides for Mark.” This money will go to Youth Focus and will give some kids and their families the support they need to deal with their huge mental health challenges. They may even save a life. 

This epic ride which started on May 5th and finished today on the 11th didn’t just happen in a week, this years ride was decided on in November last year and Steve and James hold down full time jobs and study. They have trained before and after work with long rides on weekends and still found time to see their girfriends, have a beer with their mates and catch up with family. Who says the young people of today are not organised, efficient and productive. They are to be admired as wonderful role models.

These two brave, humble men have ridden over 1250 kilometers, spent over 70 hours on the road, over 60 hours on the actual bikes over 7 days. They have eaten 3 cows, 4kgs of calamari, 11 loaves of bread, 5kgs of chocolate, 18 bags of jubes and snake sweets, drunk around 80 litres of water and 50 litres of Gatorade and not a drop of alcohol.

They have used 2 full tubs of numb-bum cream, stopped going behind bushes to wee, stopped worrying whether they looked good in photos, learnt how to sleep on a rock and not notice a massive road-train whizz by two meters away.

They have oozed determination and teamwork, incredible strength of body and character and have demonstrated the wonderful quality of knowing how to give when the reward is just in the giving itself.

Lets applaud our two special men Steven and James”

This advice reminded me of my days helping to run large law firms – I happened to enjoy walking around, at least weekly, talking to staff and partners in various sections of the firm – apart from being enjoyable, it was amazing how much one picked up and could convey in those informal interactions.

Remember to walk the fence-lines of your firm - talking to partners and staff - you will pick up on issues, identify achievements and be showing an interest in those who make the wheels go round (Sean Larkan image ©: Austral Eden region, NSW)

I did notice though as I got busy, or we had to deal with one or other crisis, this practice somehow seemed to slip into the background, priority-wise. Sometimes too, one may be tied up with a merger – ‘important stuff‘, and it always got priority. It always took time to get back to the walking around ritual, each time reminding myself – ‘can’t let that drift’.

I had this message brought home to me again last week when the editor from the publisher of my upcoming book on law firm branding arranged a new time-table for me. I had fallen behind my schedule – she said with my consent she would ‘walk my fence-line’ i.e. keep closer tabs on me. What a nice way to say ‘listen, I am keeping an eye on you – time to start delivering‘!

There are a number of benefits flowing from walking the fence-line:

• keeping in touch with what is truly going on out there;
• getting grounded;
• getting to know your people and their names;
• meeting someone who has recently arrived and not been introduced to you;
• seeing people on other floors or buildings;
• providing news of and support for important firm initiatives;
• related to the previous point, explaining or re-iterating the firm’s guiding principles, vision and strategy – it is so much more powerful to do this in casual conversations;
• reminding yourself and others that no matter how busy you are with strategic issues, nothing is more important than being in touch with your people;
• getting yourself out of your ‘ivory tower’, physical or otherwise;
• taking an interest in others and their issues;
• hearing about achievements, the news of which you can then spread while on your rounds e.g. a lawyer who has recently had a good business building win;
• picking up on issues which can then be quickly relayed to the appropriate person for attention e.g. telling the HR manager a young lawyer is unhappy or out of work, or telling a partner in resources that a planning and environment partner is keen to be cross-sold to some resources clients;
• a time to re-affirm your faith in your managers and senior staff – hearing of something that needs attention and instead of trying to deal with it yourself, tell the staff member it will be referred to the manager and he or she will make sure it is addressed; and
• it provides you with real-life stories for your next staff or partner talk.

Get someone else involved:  it is also not a bad thing to get someone else to ‘walk your fence-line’ for you from time to time, and provide you with independent feedback.

• I do a lot of this for firms following organisational reviews.
• My new tenant on my farm did the same for me recently – he toured the farm, including my ‘fence-lines’, and pointed out a couple of areas that needed attention – he even provided a neat written report – we are attending to them before he takes over!
• LEXBLOG effectively did this for me recently in relation to this Legal Leaders blog – they made a number of excellent suggestions for improvement and initiated the changes in a very good time-frame – I hope you like it!

An essential thing – while walking around, if you undertake to do something (and there will always be something), make sure you do it, and follow-up/follow-through.

There are also some very good related points made in a Mind Tools post I read recently – it referred to MBWA i.e. management by walking around – essentially what I have been talking about here. It is worth a read.

all the best, Sean Larkan, Partner, Edge International

Nothing beats being accessible, responsive and reliable. You can be the sharpest tool in the shed, but if you can't be found, don't respond well when used or don't do the job you are called on to do, people will eventually tire of using you. The same applies to professionals. (Sean Larkan image - Old Dairy Gerringong - ©2012)

I know of one professional who is highly sought after due to his niche practice and ability. As a consequence he is very busy and time-poor. So busy in fact that he has an automated message responding to his emails, always, saying ‘sorry tied up doing x, y or z. Your enquiry is important, I will revert etc’ – unfortunately, you usually don’t get a response from him, not even later. You soon get the message, his work is more important than your enquiry or message. He has made himself inaccessible, is unresponsive and in your mind will probably not be reliable to deal with. In fact he also appears to be discourteous.

On the other hand we all know professionals who are busier than most, but who still manage to be remarkably accessible, courteous, responsive and reliable – some come to mind for me – Michael Katz, chairman of Edward Nathan Sonnenbergs, Rob Otty, Managing Director of Norton Rose RSA, Jordan Furlong my partner in Edge International, Giam Swiegers, National CEO of Deloitte, Australia, John Poulsen managing partner of Squire Sanders (formerly Minter Ellison, Perth), Roger Collins Chairman of Grant Thornton Australia and Derek Colenbrander CEO of CareFlight Australia.

One of the most enjoyable responsibilities I had as a former managing partner of large firms was to do a short introductory talk to new recently-joined lawyers. The discussion, which we tried to make interactive, commenced by asking what they felt they would need to do or be to succeed in a large firm environment. As one would expect coming from the brightest law school graduates, the responses were varied and fascinating. However, not many picked up on these seemingly obvious attributes: accessibility, responsiveness and reliability. It was possible to emphasise these, providing examples, without names, of lawyers who did not have the best university pass or who were not regarded as the best technical lawyers in their practice area, but who rose to greatness and built substantial practices, at least in part due to these characteristics. I also emphasised that a big part of their early success would depend on their courtesy to staff, mainly support staff.

Your personal brand:

Your personal reputation and brand is not what you think it is but what existing and potential clients and other referrers think it is. And clients and referrers love their professionals to be accessible, responsive, courteous and reliable. If they feel you are, your brand and reputation is going to soar in their eyes. They will go out of their way to refer you other work.

There are a couple of reasons for this:

• you are showing them respect and care about their views and well-being;
• you save them time as they never need to chase you up; you appreciate that their time is as precious as your time;
• you will make them look good;
• they can relax knowing their matter is being cared for; and
• they will be more likely to trust you and your advice.

There are also benefits for you:

• it takes the pressure off you;
• you can concentrate on the matter at hand and not worry about letting someone down;
• you can bring the best out of yourself;
• your own confidence grows as you realise you are doing something which is the foundation of strong professional relationships and ultimately friendships – trust, respect and in time loyalty, which leads to a cast iron stream of referrals.

As we hear  so often from so many, it is often the simple, obvious things that make a difference. These are definitely those.

all the best, Sean Larkan, Partner, Edge International

He was feisty, scary, tough on people, very often unreasonable and downright rude - people at Apple didn't want to get in the lift with him! But he did have another side. . . . . ..

So what are the personal style and leadership characteristics of Jobs one would not recommend for legal leaders?

1. being more about me than about you
2. not caring about others’ feelings
3. aggression and anger openly used in discussions with others
4. out and out rejection of ideas – ‘that is crap‘
5. strong language
6. expecting/demanding the impossible
7. being devious in demanding things from others
8. being more selfish than selfless
9. not taking a genuine interest in the personal and professional well-being of others
10. simply expecting others to be able to handle his style and approach

and so on, you get the drift, but he, unlike most of us, could pull this off because of who he was and what he had achieved. He could afford to hire highly paid, highly capable, tough people who could handle it all and it worked, brilliantly. In my experience many senior leaders like managing partners don’t exhibit these tendencies, and I don’t think it would go down too well or be swallowed in a legal environment.However, pause and look around the office and there are usually some leaders who do – they need to be addressed on this as it can be a deadener to your employment brand if it is not.

And now, one last thing. . . . many of you will know Steve Jobs often ended off his renowned presentations – many of them quite long – with a pause, raised his finger, turned to the audience and said ‘ah, just one more thing . . . ‘ and then launched into discussion about a key development. This was the item that usually stuck in everyone’s mind.

Well, I thought of a couple of  ‘just one more things’ that weren’t mentioned by Isaacson in his HBR article:

19  His passion about presentations. Too often we see leaders presenting without having given much thought to the tone, content, length and many others keys to effective presentation – these are golden opportunities lost. Jobs has a lesson for every leader – treat every presentation opportunity as the most important thing on your agenda – and the key to making the most of it is not your natural oratory skills, but the hard work and thought you put in beforehand.

Sure, he was dead against PowerPoint (maybe because of the way he felt about Microsoft), but he did use visuals and accessories – but he has become well known for the way he presented – books have been written about it –  I own one and it makes some good points – also check out YouTube for many memorable examples. Here are some of the things he emphasised (some from ‘The presentation secrets of Steve Jobs’ by Carmine Gallo):

1. Preparation is key
• create the story
• be ready to answer the one question that matters most to the audience
• don’t use PowerPoint
2. Deliver the goods:
• pause
• change the pace
• introduce an antagonist and reveal a conquering hero
• create anticipation
• obey the 10 minute rule – give the audience some form of break or ‘intermission’  (e.g. show a video) after 10 minutes – not a second later
3. Practice, practice, practice
• make it look easy
• get to a point where you don’t need a script
• wear the right garb
• have fun
• and always remember the ‘one last thing’, revealing the ‘holy shit’ moment

20   Injecting psychological content into a physical product:

He had an amazing ability – intuition really – about creating emotion and passion around his physical products – people became and still do, emotionally attached to them, almost without exception, possibly due to his passion around wanting computers to be ‘more human’. I remember one of his comments when the iMac was launched which summed this up – ‘they look so good you kinda wanna lick em’. Also in relation to the confluence of technology and the arts – ‘it makes our hearts sing’.

'They look so good you kinda wanna lick 'em' . . . . 'looks like its from a different planet, and a good planet'

21  Sharing

In some respects I think he started the whole concept of sharing which is so much a foundation stone of the social media phenomenon today. He talked of ‘inter-personal’ computing, not personal computing. Sharing music. Sharing photos. Sharing movies.  His products all made it easy.

22  Copying ideas

He didn’t think he had all the ideas. He was quite open about this. He got the idea for the mouse from Xerox, but he turned it into a one-button mouse costing $15 instead of $300 which would also work on his jeans. He didn’t invent the MP3 music player. He reinvented it. He connected dots, put ideas into reality.

23  The X factor

While there has not been much not written about leadership I haven’t personally seen anything on what I call the leadership X-factor – that something that makes some people, despite all their foibles and faults, some glaring, good business leaders and of people. He had the X factor. He instinctively knew how to get through to people – his ‘think different’ advert was conjured up as a call to action for Apple employees. It worked brilliantly.

24  Style and substance (the product) are not different things

To Steve Jobs style and aesthetics on the one hand and the physical product on the other were not separate. Style was the substance. The better things looked the more people wanted them. He understood this.  He didn’t just open a chain of Apple shops – he opened a chain of ‘experiences’. I think legal leaders should seriously take this into account – with websites, documents, reception areas, presentation of staff, the way telephones are answered and many other things.

25  He had a special way with vision

He didn’t simply evolve a clear vision and stick with it. The vision, or more correctly, the visions, were continually evolving to meet new challenges. He didn’t focus on products as he thought they would be good sellers. His vision was to become ‘more consumer‘ so he wanted Apple to make stuff that made sense for people, made them more creative, let them have more fun – this led to the iPod and the iPhone. Another of his visions was that ‘content would be king‘. In realising this, he created the future of entertainment. Another vision was that Apps were key- he effectively demonstrated how bits of the Internet could be packaged.

26  And finally, truly one last thing . . . . the simple but important things – he set an example with an austere, spartan existence – always appeared simply in jeans and a black sweater – he had a close family and sparse furnishings in his homes, with barely anywhere to sit down – in this day of public ridicule of CEOs living the high life, it is a sobering example. He followed Zen thinking and felt there was beauty in simplicity. He was not into money or possessions. He felt Apple would do more if it did less – he killed off many products.

Each of us will remember him for different things – the fantastic thing for me is there is so much about his leadership traits that one can bear in mind, adapt and use in a practical way. I know legal leaders could, too. What I particularly liked about him was that the inner-hippy in him remained strong and true – he never left the counter-culture – he stayed hungry and stayed foolish.

all the best, Sean Larkan, Partner, Edge International

Difficult partners, like angry babies, can at times be impossible. You need to be geared up to deal with them and not avoid the issues they bring to the firm. EQ techniques can provide some pointers.

Just like angry babies, difficult partners sometimes defy logic. While some partners may be blissfully unaware of the negative impact they have on those around them, some  almost seem to get satisfaction from being obstructive, creating chaos and pushing other people’s buttons. Either way, they create unnecessary complexity and strife and end up wasting a heck of a lot of leadership and management time.

Bradberry  (author of Emotional Intelligence 2.0) makes two important points:

1. to deal with difficult people effectively, you need an approach that enables you, across the board, to control what you can eliminate and know what you can’t; and
2. the important thing to remember when it comes to difficult partners, and the impact that they have on you and the firm, is that you are in control of far more than you realize.

Suggested steps:

Distance yourself emotionally and if necessary buy yourself some time

Difficult partners can drive you crazy because their behavior can be so irrational but smoothly layered in eloquent, intelligent sounding argument or point-taking.  Their behavior can truly go against reason and you have to ask yourself why you allow yourself to respond to them emotionally and get sucked in?

The more irrational and out of line someone is, the easier it should be for you to distance yourself from them. In other words, don’t try beating them at their own game. Distance yourself from them emotionally and approach your interactions rationally, without emotion—only the facts. This can be difficult in the heat of the moment but if you think about it first, and plan to do it next time, you can ensure practice makes perfect.

Keeping this emotional distance requires emotional awareness. You can’t stop someone from pushing your buttons if you don’t recognize when it’s happening. Sometimes you’ll find yourself in situations where you’ll need to regroup and choose the best way forward. This is fine and you shouldn’t be afraid to buy yourself some time to do so. If you’re going to have to straighten them out, it’s better to give yourself some time to plan the best way to go about it.

Set Boundaries

This is the area where leaders and managers tend to sell themselves short; because they are dealing with a partner, they feel they have no way to control the issue  and sometimes avoid it. This couldn’t be further from the truth. Once you’ve found your way to emotionally distance yourself from a person, you’ll begin to find their behavior more predictable and easier to understand. This will equip you to think rationally about when and where you have to put up with them and when you don’t. You may even want to limit the number of interactions you have for a while, but certainly do not avoid contact or addressing the issue.

You can set limits, but you’ll have to do so consciously and proactively. If you let things happen naturally, you could find yourself constantly embroiled in difficult conversations. If you set boundaries and decide when and where you’ll engage a difficult person, you can control much of the challenges. The only trick is to stick to your guns and keep boundaries in place when the person tries to encroach upon them, which they no doubt will.

Talk About It

There’s nothing wrong with discussing a difficult person with a few trusted others in the firm, but the idea here is to use it as a means of moving forward and not just to complain. Its not a bad idea to share your plans as others can give you feedback and guidance as you pursue these steps. As independent outsiders they will be able to more easily see when your emotions are getting the better of you, and can help you to maintain a rational perspective. When it comes to boundaries, with luck you’re going to find these trusted others asking a lot of good “what if” questions to help you consider new ways to set boundaries. The quality of this feedback will depend on them getting some detail of what you are trying to accomplish in dealing with the difficult partner. If they don’t understand that you have a plan, they may just feed the problem by getting you riled up over how terrible it is that you’re once again stuck with such a difficult partner.

Bringing It All Together

Before you get this approach to work satisfactorily, you’re going to have to work on your own emotional intelligence and understand your own EQ. This is important as you will find yourself being tested by your difficult partners. A good way to do this is to undertake the emotional intelligence test that comes with the 2.0 book mentioned above. Then learn the strategies that can help you avoid getting blind-sided by things that are not your emotional intelligence strengths.

Also consider these three additional strategies from the book which can be helpful in dealing with difficult people:

Self-Management Strategy #9 – taking control of your self-talk:

• we apparently have about 50,000 thoughts per day and there is a strong relationship between what we think (our self-talk) and how we feel, both physically and emotionally. We can take this into discussions.
• for this reason it is important to carefully manage our self-talk, particularly if it becomes negative as this can send you into a downward emotional spiral that makes it challenging to deal with difficult partners.
• when a rush of emotion comes over you (like when dealing with a difficult partner), your thoughts turn the heat up or down. By learning to control your self-talk, you can keep yourself focused on the right thoughts and manage your emotions more effectively.

Social Awareness Strategy #11 – practice the art of listening:

• listening is an important social skill to master so you can deal with difficult partners.
• it is not just about hearing words but also about tone, what is not being said, and any hidden messages.
• for instance, practice stopping everything else you are doing or thinking about and listen fully till the other person has finished speaking. Focus, listen and stay in the present moment. By doing this you are also showing the other person respect.

Self-Management Strategy #4 - count to ten

• according to Bradberry this is one of the most effective (and I would guess, simple) strategies for turning down the temperature when emotions start to run hot.
• you will probably won’t even have to get to 10 but if you start the counting you will have cooled down and given your rational side time to catch up with your emotions.

I have focused on dealing with difficult partners in the last three posts as this is a challenge for most law firm leaders and senior managers. It is something we need to be able to do as effectively as we possibly can. I hope the tips on what not to do, what to do and the above pointers in regard to your own emotional intelligence quotients and strategies have provided you with a useful framework.  I would welcome any further thoughts or experiences you may wish to share.

all the best, Sean, Edge International.

‘Difficult’ comes in various shapes and forms. They can be brilliant, top fee earners who are loved by their clients but who create trouble for everyone else, or they may be disgruntled, serial under-performers.  These distinctions don’t really matter for the purposes of this article – we can probably all recognise ‘difficult’ when we see and experience it.  Invariably, as a leader you are going to come under some form of pressure in relation to them. So, it is important you know how to respond and that you actually tackle and not avoid the challenge.

Difficult partners can be hard, gnarly nuts to deal with. They come in all shapes and forms. It is important that you don't default to simply bowing to their pressure or avoiding them. Try to find the balance. Whatever you do keep the lines of communication open and a respectful relationship, no matter what. ((c) Sean Larkan image)

It is tempting, even sub-consciously, to distance yourself from such a partner. Or to go soft on them and bow to their pressure in the mistaken belief this will ‘get it out of the way’. This is mainly because most of us don’t relish conflict. These unfortunately are very common courses followed by even the best leaders. My advice, don’t follow either.

If you bow to difficult partners you are effectively giving in to the play-ground bully – the issue may subside for a while when he/she realises they have their way, but it will crop up again and bite you. Also, don’t try to get rid of it by simply ignoring it. You are then guilty yourself of passive-defensive behaviour which is a clear sign of insecurity.  Difficult partners have a keen nose for this insecurity and feed on it.  It will only be a matter of time before something else comes up. You will then be on the run with a track record of having ducked these challenging  issue.

There are some real costs involved in not addressing issues around difficult partners:

• as leader, your own confidence will start to wane. Others may even start to lose respect for you;
• other partners will question why the ‘difficult one’ gets the special treatment while they have to meet all firm requirements and live by the values;
• it can make a mockery of your values and your partnership principles; they will be forever undermined;
• staff turnover may be impacted negatively; invariably your employment brand will be tarnished; and
• the time spent on dealing with such partners is enormous, it is exhausting and emotionally draining, which can leave little time and energy for anything else.

Fortunately, with a bit of thought, awareness, planning and preparedness to work your way through sometimes tough situations, these costs are avoidable. In fact, with persistence, patience and toughness (not ruthlessness or aggression) you can turn them around, even if it may take months or even years.

Let’s first summarise what you should not do when faced with one or more difficult partners – do not:

• don’t simply assume that they are a difficult personality and that nothing can be done about it. Very often, certainly in regard to behavioural styles, you can.
• respond to anger or aggression with anger or aggression, even when your patience has worn thin and you are driven to distraction. These are completely unhelpful emotions anyway and help neither party, particularly in these circumstances. This will merely paint you into a corner with no-where to go;
• distance yourself, stop communicating or taking an interest in the partner, as much as this may be tempting;
• avoid being tough where this is necessary, provided you are being fair and reasonable;
• focus on the person or personality as this only makes them more defensive;
• be vague when describing behaviours that are concerning to you or the firm;
• fail to describe why the behaviours concern you and make it clear you want change;
• do all the talking; this is the most important time to hone your listening skills;
• think you have all the answers  (after all the real solution to the problem ultimately has to come from the difficult partner);
• fool yourself that their excellent productivity, fee production or business building capability is ‘worth the pain’; it usually isn’t;
• forget to be encouraging and supportive;
• ignore the clear tenets of your firm’s core values to make an exception. They will be forever devalued. All staff will also be aware of this; and
• because they are difficult, give them special treatment, when other (say) less aggressive, under-performing partners are treated firmly and put on terms.

So, we now have an idea of what not to do; no doubt you can add some ideas of your own (in which event I would be grateful if you would please share them!)

In a subsequent post I will suggest a number of things you can and should do when faced with one or more difficult partners.

All the best, sean@edge-international.com

One of the main reasons thought leadership is so powerful is that it acts as a form of invisible and credible third party 'referrer' which clients trust. As a result, thought leaders have less difficulty finding new clients, winning tenders and 'closing the deal'. They can also charge at higher rates and get paid for their services.

• recognising and taking advantage of valuable, untapped stores of thought leadership assets
• clarifying what we mean by thought leadership
• understanding its benefit to lawyers and their firms
• appreciating where some unrealised thought leadership assets may lurk
• leaders or senior managers understanding steps they can and should consider to realise these assets